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On the subject of hate, by request
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by
on 2005-09-11 16:55:11 (edited 2005-09-11 16:57:22)
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by oldcrow on 02:40:16 pm 09/11/05 Thanks for clearing that up. You were weirding me out... (is weirding even a word? somehow I doubt it) Hmmm...if you don't mind my asking, why does Rin's family hate Ranger, anyway? You've mentioned that before, and now I'm curious. Heh, if you don't want to tell me that's fine. I am nosy. Weirding is only a word when appled to the novel Dune. I don't mind answering, it aloso keeps me from becoming depressed. Let me say you don't have to read this. I come from a family that is filled with hate that can be traced back to the before American revolutionary war. My family history goes to the early 1700s with the first male child in each generation joining the military. My father was a high ranking officer in the Royal Navy and is a man filled with hate for everything beautiful in the world. Ranger when we met (January 1982) was an American Air Force Major. My father hates Americans with a passion, my brother has threatend to kill Ranger and I believe him. All of this over a naval battle during the the American War of Independence where several family members were killed in a naval battle leaving only women and children to carry the name. I cannot describe fully my disgust at this attitude, not then, not now. The funny thing is it was my father who was responsible for my meeting Ranger. That's how romance happens. When I told my father I was going to marry Ranger he said if I did I would be thrown out of the house. I said I was going to marry him and I went back to my flat. Harry showed up the next morning to deliver a letter from my father disowning me. Ranger was already there and that's when Harry threatened him. Ranger answered with his usual attitude, "Take your best shot because you'll only get one". There are other incidents of hatred and violence in my life. All of them have led me to believe in being gentle and kind. There is no room in my heart for hate, only sadly deep down there is a little. Some for father and some for Harry for driving me away. There you have it true confessions. My family hates me, except for Gwen and mother who died in 2003 and I didn't even find out about that until my birthday this year, July 4th, American Independence Day. My father never liked that, which I repeatedly learned on various birthdays through acts of so cruel I still have nightmares. He never touched me, he had other ways to destroy what little there was of me. I never thought anyone could be so cruel. Ranger took me away from that. My father is a bigot with his hate buried in history, in war. What could be worse. I abhor war, violence, hate and bigotry. There is no room for it in my home or in my haert and I try very hard to remember that. As you get older you look at your past differently. I do, but not that. Ranger I think it's perfectly said in Mahoromatic. Lady Rin is gentle of heart and pure of heart. She is the owner of a perfect heart.  |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by night_link
on 2005-09-11 21:01:17 (edited 2005-09-11 21:01:40)
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Hate... The world just can't just stop with it because it's a way of life isn't it? I haven't lived long enough to experience hate like you Lady Rin. I'm sorry. But what I do know is that some hate I have that keeps coming back and back every time I bury it. There's many things I have to myself: my memories and my emotions. Just these two most of the time. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by desertranger
on 2005-09-11 22:52:09
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Rin made a typo. we met on 27 Jan 83 around 2130hrs. I have learned something important about hate from Milady. Not to bury it but to let it go. I hated her old man for a long time, Harry too. Rin told me they were not worth the effort and asked me to to turn my hate for them into love for her. It was a good trade. Harry is welcome here in peace. Either that or he leaves in pieces. Either way makes no diff to me. My life is Lady Rin who is next to me smiling in her sleep as I make this post. We can all learn about hate from her. We can learn about love too.  |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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So, Lady Rin, was your paternal family on the side of the British during the American Revolution? But wow, ranger you are great, wish I had that much courage facing someone who hates me enough to threaten to kill me. And I know of hate, I hate my younger brother, I hate how he defies my authority as the older brother. I hate how he turns what I've taught him into a tool against me (I have weak confidence and it doesnt help when someone keep telling I suck while copying everything I do). But I dont understand the hate of Rin's father. Lady Rin and Ranger, I'm so envious of your relationship. Hope I'll find one like that together with a girl as gentle and kind as Rin. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by
on 2005-09-12 07:38:29 (edited 2005-09-12 07:44:09)
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Togther we  Ranger and Rin Rin Seki I understand what you are saying about your brother and as much as I wish not to hate Harry there is some. However I don't let it control me the way some people let hate control them. As for what side we were on, my family's English so what side do you think we were on. *giggles* Ranger It's too early for this. Rin said, "You answer". Seki said: ...courage facing someone who hates me enough to threaten to kill me That's not courage Seki. At least it doesn't fit my definition of courage. Harry's a bully, he's also a big guy and he used to pick on his sisters. But he lacks something most English people lack, in my opinion. A willingness to fight, a willingness to get hurt defending what they believe in. I have that and I'm not afraid to get hurt protecting Rin. I'm not afraid to kill someone. I did it in Vietnam, on the ground, close enough to see who I shot. I almost did it the night Rin was assaulted only Wendy and some of my friends stopped me from killing the SOB. Too bad they did because I never got the satisfaction of sending them both to the hospital, only one. I was in law enforcement as a Tribal-ranger and I carry a Lama Omni .45cal pistol(fastest piistol in the world> with me and have a Barretta .45 cal in the car. If it is at all possible I shall be there to protect her. The problem is I'm overprotective. Don't get the idea Rin is weak and delicate. She can fly a plane, drives an SUV well over the speed limit and can face down a rattler. She is also a very good eco-guide (However her idea of roughing it is, "Hello, room service). Rin's father hates Americans because of a series of naval battles in 1779. I understand his hate. :twisted grin: Can I be dramatic about this? It is American military history, one of my fav subjects. Time to learn something:#12,484, The American Revolution - The navy The skipper of the American warship "Ranger" fought several battles near northern Ireland and Flambourgouh Head England including one against the HMS Drake, a 20 gun sloop. The Capt of the the Drake was killed along with several other crew members including, 2 Lts. named Dobbs and Penryn. The "Ranger" captured the Drake and her crew and later ransomed the officers freedom including another Penryn, this one a midshipman badly injured who survived. The two Penryn's were direct ancestors of Lady Rin, her great-grand father X4 or 5(?) and his brother. After that battle the name of the "Ranger's' Capt became infamous in England and the Royal Navy hunted him down. In the meantime this Capt is raiding very successfully all along the English coast eventually sailing his ship to France where he got a new ship he named the Bonhomme Richard. The Richard sailed back to England and got into a battle with the HMS Serapis, a 40 gun sloop, that outgunned the Richard. In a battle over several hours(?) half of the crews aboard both ships were killed including the Capt of the Richard, which was sunk. Before the Capt of the Richard was killed he was he said something that has become known in history. At one point in the battle the American flag was shot down by the Serapis's gunners and they asked Capt, "Have you struck your colors"? The Capt of the Richard replied, "I have not yet begun to fight" and continued the battle which the Americans won. These raids were major defeats for the Royal Navy who had never been defeated before. The name of the American Capt was John Paul Jones, father of the US Navy. Those defeats are the root of her father's hate passed through the generations. That and Miladys birthday, July 4th, have always worked against her. I got lucky finding Rin. She keeps me in balance and I'm not going to let anything upset that balance. Unfortunately there are few gentle girls left in a world filled with competition and conflict. however, they are out there. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by night_link
on 2005-09-12 12:01:01 (edited 2005-09-12 12:01:17)
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My grandfather was such a person... hated by the whole family though. He was only a gambler. Gambled his money, time, and left everything to his wife when it comes to the family. I don't think a lot of people will miss him when he's gone, but just the thought of it isn't myself. Sometimes I wonder if I never remembered hate... There are people who I'm never going to want to meet again in the future because they intend harm to me. I have to have hate put aside then. I was taught to be a pacifist. From everything around me, I can't hold hate too long. But there are times when I want to use it for something useful and I can't. I'm grateful to know Lady Rin that you and Ranger still are together through so much. I know one day Seki you'll meet her and life can be totally different then on. I'm sure of it. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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Wow Rin, that's some ancestral hate your father got there. Mmm.. I've read Celestine Prophecies and Tenth Insight before and somehow, all the males in your family are stuck in their intimidator energy control drama. That the only way they feel good is to intimidate people. Lady Rin, perhaps you having been born into your family was to erase that hatred that your male relatives seems to have. But still, I can understand that how that defeat from all those centuries ago can cause hatred in your family. Sometimes I still get really angry how the Chinese lost against the imperial powers, how if China didnt lose then, it would have been China that is one of the superpowers and one that was not communist. So sometimes when I see a Chinese or Japanese chick going out with a 'guai lo' i get angry inside, even though I know it's a good thing that there is no longer any racial hatred in many areas of the world. Perhaps hatred have taken over me just a little.... |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by
on 2005-09-12 17:58:18 (edited 2005-09-12 17:59:20)
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That's an interesting point perhaps you having been born into your family was to erase that hatred that your male relatives seems to have. Except I was thrown out, humliated and left with nothing. We hadn't even set a date. I know that Ranger wanted deal with Harry right then however I wouldn't let him as much as I wanted to because I'm a pacifist as well. The sad part is I knew other girls from similar families when I was growing up. They came from wealthy families like I did rich in tradition, history and hate. It's amazing how much if it there really is. Private school was a good way to get rid of us. Most of us dodn't fit the old our families had created. It's not limited to england either. I have a friend in Singapore who came from, a similar background with the same problems in his family. We were married on Apr 27 1983, no typo this time, three months to the day after we met, I was 19. Ranger picked the date saying he wanted me to remember the most important day in my life, the day we met. A lot of people say I married too young. Some told me it would never last. April 27, 2005 was 22 years. I received an email from Gwen today. Harry is furious over her trip to the US. Too bad, she's married and not in his control. Apparently Harry tiraded against us and said he was coming to the US. I don't think he'll come, besides he doesn't know where we live, although I'm sure Ranger would send him a gold plated invitation. I do have one question however. Does his hate reach that deep? Can he not forgive or forget? That's a sad thought, not to forgive. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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Well, the book i've read is that your father and bro are trapped inside the control drama that they have created. It is actually what hell really is, to be trapped in a reality that you've created that you cannot get out. Soz to say this but your father and bro when they die they just might end up in hell (not the place of fire and eternal damnation) but they would still be trapped in their hatred. I guess getting thrown out of the house is not helping but the goal to which you were born was to rid your father and bro's hatred. i think your sister and mother were there for the same reason but somehow it didnt work. Historical hatred can run deep I guess, my dad still dont like Japanese because of the atrocities during the war and the fact the Japanese still wont face up to what happend. My dad dont "hate" them but he also say how JP got everything from us and how ungrateful they were. My dad teaches martial arts and he told me that he would NEVER accept a JP as his student, ever. |
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Re: On the subject of hate, by request
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by
on 2005-09-13 04:34:05 (edited 2005-09-13 04:38:21)
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My father and brother already live in a hell of their own making. Father is in his late 80s. I've seen their hell when it was visited on me. The brutal death of innocent puppies, the total destruction of my bedroom and things. He did that several times, the first on my 12th birthday. I have very little from my childhood except bad memories that I wish to forget. I find it amazing, even today how abusive he was. All of this because of an innocent question I asked once, and for asking I was punished and sent back to school. That was on my 12th B-day after watching death and destruction that left me shaking and in tears. I was sent back to school in the middle of summer and spent the remainder of summer there. I didn't return home until I was 14. Two years I lived there without going home. I was lucky in one respect Gwen and Jane attended the same school. When Gwen was here last month I asked her how she escaped the punishments I received. She told me that while she and Jane were punished for no apparent reason now and then I was the one who was always singled out. Why me? I'm not the oldest or youngest so why me? This is something I have tried to understand for years including countless hours in therapy. My father shall be buried with his hate andI have no doubt that Harry will as well one day. And even though I lived with it, I still don't understand. From what Gwen said I shall never reach Harry, so if it is as you say I shall never be able to bring peace to my family. |